Monthly Archives: December 2012

I am resolving that sometime “soon”, I will make happy music.  Like, upbeat and happy.  Not like happy hardcore happy, or polka happy, but happy like she music house music happy, or Heart Beats happy.  I’ve made stuff that’s “chill happy” (Happy working, Chillin), and stuff that’s “euphoric” (The Ecstasy of Life, Pixel By Pixel), and stuff that’s “slow happy” (Fractale, Pastorale), but not anything that’s like, cool awesome upbeat jazzy housey happy.  And I’m still just using these minor chords =everywhere=.  I use minor 7ths =everywhere=.  That’s why she music and all this housey stuff is so cool to me–there’s all these inverted major 7ths and suspensions and just, really housey chords that are so cool.  And the notes are less constant, less smooth, less constant-arp-y and more stabby and staccato-y.  Yeah. is sort of close, I guess.  Which makes sense, since I was half-trying to replicate the she music chiphouse style there.

So many letters I want to write!!!  jeez…

Yesterday I was really tired, and worried that I had pushed myself a little too far (went to bed after 3AM the night before because I was working on music xP).  So after coming back from work I was too tired to even want to cook…which is a shame because I haven’t cooked in sooo long and I did all my groceries at the end of last week too.  But whatever, I was feeling really bleh, so I just warmed up a frozen dinner and ate it while watching Indie Game: The Movie, which was alright.  I know it can’t really be a completely accurate depiction of the real “feeling” of working on indie games, just because…well, it necessarily must be spinning it a particular way.  It definitely lacked in some parts–I feel like if I wasn’t already sort of “in the know” I might not have really understood the significance of a lot of it.  But it did do a good job of getting across the idea that these are people who are just spending multiple years of sacrifice for this one game, that essentially just becomes like their baby, their being, everything.  Which is crazy…human beings just aren’t designed to sacrifice so much for greatness that is so far into the future.  I mean, with the marshmallow experiment we know that we aren’t designed to sacrifice for like 2 minutes or whatever, so like 2 years is ridiculous.  And you can see, they’re like, approaching mental/emotional/physical breakdown at that point.  It’s something I never want to do.  Even though it’s great to put so much effort and dedication into something, the lifestyle is too unstable and too rocky for me, and I need my stability.  So indie game dev can never be a career for me, only a hobby.

Anyways, then I tried to sleep but ended up crying instead (i’m fine) so that sort of failed, ugh.  I ended up just deciding to sleep in and get to work late today, because I need to be good to my body and take care of it…

Christmas letters 2012: 36 down, 4 more to go. :)  This is the first year ever where I’m slated to finish ahead of schedule.  I suppose it means I can actually go a little past 40.  I usually do, actually, but maybe I won’t.  I feel like any of the bonus ones I write past 40 wouldn’t really be as meaningful…I think I’ve already written to most everybody I want to.  If I have extra time left over, I should be spending it on other letters…I have one or two December birthdays coming up, for example, and then also some other letter projects that I want to do very soon.

I’m also at 643 letters total, and what’s more–I’ve finally hit 0.325 letters/day average again!  I never thought I’d see that number again, but lo and behold, I’ve done it!  I really haven’t lost it at all, have I? :)

You know what I realize I need?  I need to learn some humility!

One step at a time, though.  Before that, I’m gonna learn some waltz variations.  I know I’m supposedly really creative with em, but I haven’t tossed anything new into my bag of tricks in a long long time, seriously.