Monthly Archives: October 2012

I’m still noticing the trend of posting less these days.  I really don’t like it; I can’t help but wonder what it means.

I’m also noticing that I’m lazier recently, and I really don’t like that either.  Maybe it’s just not getting enough sleep?  I need to get better at dealing with the workday schedule–it really requires a different approach to things than I could take back when I was at  Stanford.

I just…don’t know.  Things feel different.  I think it’s just me trying to get used to a different lifestyle.  It’s so very much not as “free” as I used to be, and I think part of me is totally freaking out because I can not, cannot, not not back down on all these other things that are so important to me.

The weird thing is, it feels different than it did during last year’s summer too, I think.  I dunno, really.

Random little things have been making me feel a little bit bad recently, I think.  It’s really stupid and insignificant things that I don’t want to admit to because they’re so trivial.  But perhaps I’m not in quite the best mood because of it?  I’m not sure.

I think I both need to make sure I catch up on sleep, and go and do things that make me feel good.

So cool!!!  I want to be there!!


Now that I know the whole dance, it is really time to think about styling.  After watching many videos, it’s really cool how there are so many different ways to express the same dance!  But, the one I referenced is still the closest to how I want to dance it, even though it is not as close to the original choreo, and it’s a different cover of the song.


Yeah, shows what I mean.

Worst meal I’ve made in quite some time…sheesh.  Meat was somewhat suspect so I’m basically just eating eggs and rice.  And I’m slightly allergic to egg too!  Not being able to cook as regularly as I used to has made defrosting meat scheduling impossible.

Well, at least it’s still much better than that first time when I just threw frozen potsticker onto a heated pan with no oil and was like “…this is not right.”

Just sent out 3 letters, but I have so many more I want to write T_T

So much music I want to make too!  Sheesh!  I was in R’s room yesterday listening to music and had a bunch of tunes inspire me.

Want to draw too!

I feel like everything are a mess…even my grammar. orz  even my emoticons!!!  My body and mind are still figuring everything out.  I’m out of the *bad place*, and we are not *squeezing the juice* anymore.  But am I really a *happy camper* again?  Nnngggghhh, it is being the *silly cows*.  Sometimes I am so *frumple*.

(for the 99% of you I just lost there, I just started talking like the Orz from Star Control 2 for some random reason)

It’s just like in Heart Beats:

(Tokidoki) Fuan ga koborete 
(DAME da na) Mata KIMI no PEESU 
(Itsu no ma ni ka) Boku no kimochi made wakaranaku natte shimaisou da

(Every now and then)  My insecurity would surface 
(This is not good) I’ve gotten caught up in your pace again 
(Before I knew it) I almost can’t even understand my own feelings anymore

Aa  MAJI de dou ni ka narisou

Ahh I feel like something is seriously going wrong with me

It’s fine though…I’m happy.  Just, kind of, still floating around in the air though, not grounded.  Or maybe I landed, but I don’t know where I am, and have no map.

No matter what, just keep on dancing, drawing, writing, making music…these are the things that let my emotions out, keep me sane, and remind me of the beauty in life.


The other thing to remember is that CHIPTUNES ARE AWESOME and provide fuel for living.

Also Heart Beats is really fun.