New Beginnings

It’s a really weird sensation…I feel like I’m already done saying goodbye to everyone, like everything should already be finished, and like I should just be on my way to Vancouver for my trip.  But…there’s all this baccalaureate and commencement shenanigans to do first.  And there’s still supposed to be rejoicing and tears and everything.  But somehow it’s like wait, I’m already ready to go.  Can I just go now?  I’m done early.

Tonight’s FNW was different in a sort of refreshing way.  I remember more talking than dancing.  Part of that was because I didn’t really take incentive to dance all that much, but to be honest, I was okay with that this time.  I took a little more incentive to talk.  And that was nice.

I already knew this, but I was spending time with Kiki today as she was packing, and it just was so obvious.  “You really need me.” I said.  And she agreed without a doubt.  She really, really needs me.  And that makes me feel really validated…the fact that I’m indispensable–irreplaceable–to someone.

Spring and Summer have traditionally been my least-liked seasons.  Especially Summer.  Something about there not being school, not having that normal routine of social interaction (though, who knows how -that- will go when I’m living in graduate housing?).  And of course, that goddamn sun ruining everything.  You know, I’m really awfully pissed off that the sun decided to return right in time for graduation.  I suppose I shouldn’t be–after all, this is the way that most everyone else wants it.  But man, do you know how awesome I would feel if it it were cloudy for graduation ceremonies?  I mean not cloudy as in gray clouds darkening the sky everywhere, but just gently cloudy so that the sun isn’t shining on you.  No worrying about sunscreen and sunburns, no sun in your eyes, no harsh shadows.  Just soft, gentle weather.  Man, it would be awesome.

Actually, maybe it’ll be like that for the earlier half of tomorrow, according to the forecast.  One can still hope…

But anyways, Summer has always been one of my least-liked seasons.  Not a -bad- season or anything (okay, bad weather, but…), but it always pales in comparison to Winter.  (Ah, winter…oh how fond I am of you.)

But you know what?  Bring it on.  Bring it, Summer.  I’m ready for you.  Anyday now.  I’m ready.  I’m going to make it awesome.


Somehow, this graduation is feeling less and less like an end, and more and more like a beginning.


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