Monthly Archives: October 2010

reactions to FB “friend page”:

other people #1: wow this is really cool!
other people #2: shit, this is also really scary.

me #1: bahahahahaha i purge my flist regularly i only have <200 instead of 800 and I trust them all.
me #2: well it’s not like that’s anywhere near as revealing as what I put up on here.

Well, back from Mausoleum party.  I only stuck around for a little bit–Ellen drove me, which I’m very thankful for; I wouldn’t have wanted to stay any longer, unless I had run into some close friends.  And even then, probably not, unless it happened that a whole bunch of my good friends just happened to be congregated in one group.  Unlikely.

Anyhoo, I’ve done both work and “play” today (“play” being defined loosely) so this blog post is an attempt to get some “relax” in there too.

Went to the party in sera fuku.  Yeah, it was damn cold, but it was okay once I started dancing.  I brought 3 pair of ultras but only ended up using one–that’s about how long I danced.  The music actually wasn’t quite that bad; they had a nice 4-on-the-floor-beat going.  We (me and ellen) were kind of near the edge of the crowd and I didn’t feel like wandering in closer though; so it was a little softer than I would have liked.  But whatever.  I wanted to dance a bit so I cracked my ultras and started going.

I didn’t really feel like I was flowing that well today.  Partly because I was hindered by my outfit, partly because I’m out of practice, partly because of the atmosphere, partly because of the cold.  People reacted, but as usual they were dumb losers about it.  I brought glowsticks to mausoleum party 2 years ago too–back when it was in Old Union.  When I did it two years ago I was still into stringing, so I started doing some glowstringing.  First thing was that people were too dumb to give me space.  Second thing was that losers started to intentionally put their hands in the way and then recoil in pain when the sticks hit them.  I did not understand these people.  They were weird.

Anyways, this time a few people started to sketch on me (9_9) though not that bad.  There were some people watching in a supportive (i use the word supportive loosely) way though so it wasn’t all bad.  But I remember thinking at some point–man, you guys are all DUMB LOSERS.  I’m just going to dance and not give a shit.  So I closed my eyes and just listened to the music and flowed for a bit (though like I said the flow wasn’t really all there).

I also had the funny thought that, this weekend is yaoi-con and I would probably feel much safer around a random person who was interested in “fictional media that focus on homoerotic or homoromantic male relationships” than your everyday Stanford student at maus party.  9_9  Then again I’ve never been to yaoi-con and haven’t heard much about it so what the hell do I know anyways?

It was good to dance a bit though; haven’t done it in a while.  Last time I did was at my coworker’s wedding, which was funtimes as well though curiously enough I was slightly sick for that too, haha.  I didn’t have glowsticks at that time which was a shame.  Oh well.  Anyways, nothing will really compare to when I was dancing in Fanime like I was the only person that existed in the world.  That was pretty euphoric.  I think there are only two real scenarios that work well for me dancing and having a damn good time–either me dancing around a group of people who know me well, or me dancing when hardly anyone is around.  When I was at Fanime, after all, I went back a little later and did some more dancing when a bit of a crowd had gathered–it was then that my ultras made a circle form around me.  But that wasn’t nearly as fun as when I just busted some ultras in the middle of the not-at-all-crowded dance floor before then, and was just there, solo, with the music.

Also, ginseng released a new vid:

pretty interesting.  It’s both a good ginseng vid and a bad ginseng vid at the same time, but I argue that it’s more good than bad.  I liked it.  Makes me wish I was more skilled though.  Ah well, it’s okay.  I’m not up to “that level” in glowsticking yet, the same way that I am with music production.  And that’s fine; it’s less important to me.  But still fun!  I might hold a glowsticking workshop at some point.  We’ll see.  (I know I’m “at that level” in music production because of the feedback I’ve gotten in OHCs)

Also I am having haircut anxiety issues and I don’t know what to do.  help.

Also random people have vids of me dancing on their iphones now.  Dunno how I feel about that, other than 9_9 9_9 9_9.

Also I feel comfortable with dancing without glowsticks now, curiously enough.  It’s not at the same level at all, but I can still at least have fun doing it.

Also, people already have not enough inhibitions normally…so when their inhibitions are even lower when they’re drunk, it’s terribad!  I think even if I managed to become piss-drunk I still wouldn’t drop to the level of even a normal person.

I know I still have to do the last 3 entries of the 30-day meme.  I’m holding off on them because I want to have a significant chunk of time to write them because I anticipate them being all juicy and meaningful…or maybe at least useless rantful. =D


A hero’s destiny is never easy, especially when he dreams of nothing but the worst ahead. Darkness surrounds him, and the shrieks and howls of demons taunt him. Lets hope it’s only a nightmare. Todays theme is “The Hero’s Nightmare.”

A fun theme, for sure!  And perfect for halloween!  Though, I’m told it was just a coincidence that this theme got picked today, hahaha.

Link to my entry:

And as a special bonus this week, here’s a download link to a video that I captured that shows almost the full hour of me making the song!:

So, usually as I go into these one hour compos I have some predetermined feelings about what kind of song I want to do.  Since I did something relatively “safe” and standard last time, I wanted to try and really do something weird and out there this week.  I can’t really do ambient music as well as some of the other people (like mv), but I always tend to have fun when I go for darker and more brooding sounds.

To be honest, I was actually slightly disappointed when I first saw the theme.  All this talk about a “hero” immediately prompted me to make something really chiptune-y…something that sounds like it could have come out of an NES.  But then I soon realized that I could go in a very twisted direction by using the “nightmare” theme.

So, I decided to start out really happy and triumphant with a very “NES hero!” theme, using the tb_peach VST for some NES-sounds.  But at the end of the fanfare, I mangle the sound and then all of a sudden things go crazy as I bring out really weird moving sound textures (the ugo Motion and ugo Texture synth are =great= for these sorts of sounds).  After that brief foray (think of it as teleporting into the dream world), I use a low pad sequence that uses tritones.

And then comes probably the “catchiest” section of the song–when the bitcrushed drum beat comes in.  The decision to bitcrush the drums was very deliberate–I’ve been using bitcrushed drums in quite a few of my songs recently actually–and it really adds to the dark and brooding atmosphere, while still keeping the drumloop “tight”.

After this section I get some use out of one of the funniest VSTs ever, Delay Lama, which simulates a monk going “aaaaaaaaiiiiieeeeoooooooooooouuuooooeeiiiiaawwwaaa”.  Again I mangle it to pieces, and then all of a sudden I transition into another section where for the first time we get some tasty bass.  Then comes some simple UNTS UNTS 4-on-the-floor beats along with a theremin-style spooky synth.

The last section is perhaps the darkest.  There’s a nice pad/arp texture provided by the Alchemy VST, and then this really neat bell sound, also from alchemy.  I worked in just the right amount of dissonance into the bell parts, and it actually seems a little bit detuned, so the octaves aren’t quite in tune either.  So it’s very creepy.

And then the part that was probably most genius is the very end–there’s a big sound effect for transition, and then while a low growling texture goes on (again courtesy of ugo Motion), I throw in some big orchestral hit sounds with a lot of reverb.  And then, the kicker–the last one is reversed, with no reverb, so it’s like an abrupt end to the nightmare.  Genius, if I do say so myself. =)

So overall, a very fun entry to make!  I feel like there’s still more I can do in terms of pushing my boundaries though–the next time I go for something like this I should go for slicing up sounds like crazy and applying all sorts of stuttering/granular effects to them.  Or perhaps sampling random things and stretching them, etc etc.

A lot of the other entries were fun to listen to as well, so as always, you should check them out if you get a chance.  There’s a lot of talent that culminates here every week. =)


Somehow every thursday I manage to get stressed, usually right after OHC ends.  I guess it’s because while I have been spending my hour+10 mins composing for OHC the real world has kept on turning, and then while I’m doing listening party I sometimes want to attend to other matters at the same time.  So I kind of get anxious.

Lots of stuff to do.  We’re pushing for the game to be submitted at the end of next week, which means I have to really crunch down on it now.  It’s definitely doable, but I’m going to have to allocate a good amount of my energy to it.  Somehow I slacked off a little bit after midterms and I guess I’m a little bit wary now, hehe.

Will wear costume-y clothes this weekend!  Probably not tomorrow because of how the schedule works out…and because there’s no social dance class anyways.  I could wear costume on saturday and monday.  That seems about right.

Whenever I get into this mood there’s a few things that always help.  The main thing is getting-stuff-done-mode.  There’s also writing about it, and also sleeping, but mainly it’s getting-stuff-done-mode.  Ikuzeeeeeeee!~~

1st Christmas letter done.

whoooo!  I can rest slightly easier now.  Just need to go at a steady pace…

Also, I find out whether I got into the coterm program in a little over a week!  Exciting!  That’s also around when I get new clothes.  Exciting!