Monthly Archives: September 2004

Reasons why I own:


1. My screen name is 202 letters long.


SeriousDDRKirbyConTrickster4MagicFantasyManaTriggerBillyBlastAargonMech RyokoOrionStarFortressBoundMarioPrimeSystemCubeSmashingVertigoGTSlugUnreal CSManiAzonPiSim17ccEarthManTetrisCookieBricksRemixForever


2. I have 108 digits of pi memorized.


Pi = 3.141592653589793238462643383279502884197169399375105 82097494459320781640628620899862803482534211706798214808…


(yeah, had to split those things up or else it would screw up all the margin crap and shit…I think.)


3. I can solve a Rubik’s cube in an average of 50 seconds (my best is 29)


4. I own in SSBM.  Yes, I know what wavedashing is, and if you don’t, I can own you.


5. I own at Beatmania.  If you don’t know what that is, you’re a 114m4.  if you don’t know what =that= is…well, I can’t help you there.


Reasons why I don’t own:


1. I suck at ddr, even though everyone thinks I hella kick ass at it.  Sure, I can pass Paranoia Evolution on Heavy, but do you see me getting AA’s on Max300?


2. I still have dial-up.  Which means I can’t even try owning at CS, UT, or anything else.


3. …uh…I’m not gonna tell you this one.  No, it exists, you idiot, I’m just not telling you.  Seriously.


…you still don’t believe me.



…shut up.

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The toothpaste conspiracy:
“flavor” is an inactive ingredient in toothpaste.

DDRKirbyISQ: god
DDRKirbyISQ: what kind of company puts “flavor” in their toothpaste
DDRKirbyISQ: it’s probably some messed up compound that has properties similar to sulfiric acid
Apollo7z7: umm
DDRKirbyISQ: and that’s how it kills plaque
Apollo7z7: well
Apollo7z7: otherwise it would taste like the vat they make it in
DDRKirbyISQ: “flavor” doesn’t mean like, sugar
DDRKirbyISQ: otherwise they could just say “sugar”
DDRKirbyISQ: god
DDRKirbyISQ: which means they must be trying to hide something
Apollo7z7: yea
Apollo7z7: the vat flavor
DDRKirbyISQ: rotfl
DDRKirbyISQ: Full Lightweight Ass-Vat Of Rum
DDRKirbyISQ: F.L.A.V.O.R
Apollo7z7: lol
DDRKirbyISQ: Flaming Lard-filled Ass-Vat Of Rum
DDRKirbyISQ: and they pass it off as “flavor”
DDRKirbyISQ: rotfl
DDRKirbyISQ: I’m thinking of getting xanga just to post this convo
Apollo7z7: heh hhe
Apollo7z7: do it
DDRKirbyISQ: look
DDRKirbyISQ:
Apollo7z7: lol
DDRKirbyISQ: Flaming Lard-filled Ass-Vat Of Rum
DDRKirbyISQ: and they pass it off as “flavor”
NaTuRLySToNed7z7: LOL
NaTuRLySToNed7z7: why the f*** does toothpaste have sorbitol!?
DDRKirbyISQ: lol
DDRKirbyISQ:
NaTuRLySToNed7z7: isn’t that stuff that makes you fart?
DDRKirbyISQ: rotfl
NaTuRLySToNed7z7: mints have it too
NaTuRLySToNed7z7: they just put it in random stuff
NaTuRLySToNed7z7: to piss you off
DDRKirbyISQ: well
Apollo7z7: xanga is great because you can say almost anything with relatively few consequences
DDRKirbyISQ:
DDRKirbyISQ: according to this,
DDRKirbyISQ: Sorbitol is a sugar alcohol the body uses slowly. It is an artificial sweetener used in diet foods. It is called a nutritive sweetener because it has four calories in every gram, just like table sugar and starch.

Sorbitol is also produced by the body. Too much sorbitol in cells can cause damage. Diabetic retinopathy and neuropathy may be related to too much sorbitol in the cells of the eyes and nerves
DDRKirbyISQ:
DDRKirbyISQ: so it’s an artificial sweetener
NaTuRLySToNed7z7: oohh
DDRKirbyISQ: which means, that they SHOULDN’t NEED “flavor”!!!!
NaTuRLySToNed7z7: thank god
NaTuRLySToNed7z7: omg
NaTuRLySToNed7z7: YEAH!
DDRKirbyISQ:
DDRKirbyISQ: this is becoming more and more suspicious
DDRKirbyISQ: it’s a conspiracy
NaTuRLySToNed7z7: lol
NaTuRLySToNed7z7: Sorbitol is also produced by the body.
DDRKirbyISQ:
DDRKirbyISQ: they’re probably implanting tiny nanites into the “flavor”
NaTuRLySToNed7z7: that explains a lot…
NaTuRLySToNed7z7: nanites?
DDRKirbyISQ: and then one day we’ll wake up and they’ll rewire our brains and make us slaves
DDRKirbyISQ:
NaTuRLySToNed7z7: lol
DDRKirbyISQ: I mean come on, it would be so easy
DDRKirbyISQ: because the mouth is so close to your brain
DDRKirbyISQ: so the nanites dont have to travel as far
DDRKirbyISQ: god
DDRKirbyISQ:
DDRKirbyISQ: thank goodness I dont use that brand
DDRKirbyISQ: …or do i….
DDRKirbyISQ: crap lemme go check
NaTuRLySToNed7z7: LOL!!
DDRKirbyISQ:
DDRKirbyISQ: fuck
DDRKirbyISQ: I dont use that brand
DDRKirbyISQ: but this is even worse
DDRKirbyISQ: my toothpaste doesn’t even say the inactive ingredients
DDRKirbyISQ: and the worst part is
DDRKirbyISQ:
DDRKirbyISQ: it says
DDRKirbyISQ: “store in a dry, cool place”
DDRKirbyISQ: god
DDRKirbyISQ: of course
DDRKirbyISQ:
DDRKirbyISQ: it’d have to be dry, because moisture could short-circuit the nanites
DDRKirbyISQ: and you’d have to keep them cool so they won’t overheat
DDRKirbyISQ: frick
NaTuRLySToNed7z7: lol
Apollo7z7: only trouble is
Apollo7z7: you get toothpaste wet when you brush your teeth with it
DDRKirbyISQ: hmm…
DDRKirbyISQ: you have a point
DDRKirbyISQ: so then it wouldn’t matter if you keep it dry or not
DDRKirbyISQ: unless of course, they just don’t want you diluting it
Apollo7z7: unless it decides to spontaneoulsy combust
DDRKirbyISQ: the other stuff in the toothpaste probably acts as a carrier for the nanites
Apollo7z7: thats prolyl why you cant
Apollo7z7: heat it up
DDRKirbyISQ: dude, you should try microwaving toothpaste
DDRKirbyISQ: and it’ll like explode
Apollo7z7: umm
Apollo7z7: ill let you do that
DDRKirbyISQ: no, I’ve already experimented with microwaving enuff
DDRKirbyISQ: did you know that you can melt aluminum in microwaves?
DDRKirbyISQ: but you can’t melt stainless steel
Apollo7z7: !
Apollo7z7: timmy
Apollo7z7: where can i get stainless steel
DDRKirbyISQ: it just sparks and stuff

Starcraft bogus rant 1: Overmind Broodlings


DDRKirbyISQ: I owned 2 comps


DDRKirbyISQ: as in PWNED


Hermes7z7: hahahahha


Hermes7z7: awesome


DDRKirbyISQ: ling rushed the toss one


DDRKirbyISQ: 8 lings vs 2 zealots….hmm…


DDRKirbyISQ: and then I noticed that my mass hydras were getting wasted by sunkens


DDRKirbyISQ: so I massed mutas and owned


Hermes7z7: with ppl you gotta change ALOT tho


DDRKirbyISQ: yeah


DDRKirbyISQ: I kno


DDRKirbyISQ: comps dont mass cannons


DDRKirbyISQ: although comps do use psionic storm…ugh


DDRKirbyISQ: and comps like corsairs


DDRKirbyISQ: hydras would be unstoppable with runewords


Hermes7z7: hahaha


Hermes7z7: yea


DDRKirbyISQ: dark swarm + zealots


DDRKirbyISQ: ownz


DDRKirbyISQ: but the best is


DDRKirbyISQ: civilian + defensive matrix


DDRKirbyISQ: it’s like a nuke x 10


DDRKirbyISQ: hallucinating a bunker is almost as good


DDRKirbyISQ: in fact


DDRKirbyISQ: you should hallucinate a bunker,


DDRKirbyISQ: then put cilivilians with defensive matrix inside


DDRKirbyISQ: then fly it into your enemy’s base


DDRKirbyISQ: they’ll be like, “crap, there’s a flying bunker!”


DDRKirbyISQ: then they’ll try to shoot it down.


DDRKirbyISQ: that’s when you unload your civilians


DDRKirbyISQ: then they’re screwed


DDRKirbyISQ: especially if you have parasites on the civilians


DDRKirbyISQ: but the ABSOLUTE best unit


DDRKirbyISQ: is the overmind broodling


DDRKirbyISQ: just cast spawn broodling on the overmind,


DDRKirbyISQ: and there are these HUUUUGE broodlings that do about 10 times as much damage as ultralisks


DDRKirbyISQ: and if you have adrenal glands, they attack just as fast as a zergling


DDRKirbyISQ: and they’re basically invincible


DDRKirbyISQ: they have 1000 hp


DDRKirbyISQ: and it regenerates 10 every second


DDRKirbyISQ: and the only way to kill them is with dark templar


DDRKirbyISQ: but even then, you have to kill all 6 of them at once


DDRKirbyISQ: otherwise they just multiply


DDRKirbyISQ: of course, you could try using 10 nukes


DDRKirbyISQ: but by the time you launch them, both your ghosts AND your nuclear silos will be dead


DDRKirbyISQ: along with most of your base


DDRKirbyISQ: which is why dark templar are the way to go


DDRKirbyISQ: and dont even think about using air


DDRKirbyISQ: their air attack spores do like, 500 damage


DDRKirbyISQ: plus, they shoot in a cluster like valk missiles


Hermes7z7: timmy your thinking of good damage things


Hermes7z7: but it never really works out


DDRKirbyISQ: if you use yamato gun, you might be able to get in a hit or two, but then you’re screwed


Hermes7z7: in reality NO ONE uses yomato gun


DDRKirbyISQ: they try against overmind broodling


DDRKirbyISQ: s


DDRKirbyISQ: cuz to destroy overmind broodlings you need EVERYTHING YOU HAVE


DDRKirbyISQ: you could try using carriers,


DDRKirbyISQ: but again, the spore defense system does about 500 damage


DDRKirbyISQ: and it’s the only attack in the entire game that actually kills interceptors


DDRKirbyISQ: so dark templar are your best bet


DDRKirbyISQ: especially if you have Zeratul


DDRKirbyISQ: because he gets a damage bonus


DDRKirbyISQ: but then again, that can throw off your sync, causing you to destroy one of them faster than the others


DDRKirbyISQ: so then they multiply


DDRKirbyISQ: and then you’re just SCREWED


DDRKirbyISQ: you could try sending infested terrans against em,


Hermes7z7: TIMMY


DDRKirbyISQ: but there’s a 50% chance that they’ll get absorbed into the broodling


Hermes7z7: its fun to think about but this never will really happen unless its a comp


DDRKirbyISQ: and then it regenerates even gaster


Hermes7z7: your not thinking real


DDRKirbyISQ: *faster


DDRKirbyISQ: lol


DDRKirbyISQ: OMFG


DDRKirbyISQ: you IDIOT


DDRKirbyISQ: it will plain NEVER happen


DDRKirbyISQ: lol


DDRKirbyISQ: I’m talking about OVERMIND BROODLINGS


Hermes7z7: i wasnt reading what you were saying


DDRKirbyISQ: read back


DDRKirbyISQ: from the top


Hermes7z7: later


Hermes7z7: im busy


DDRKirbyISQ: lol


Hermes7z7: not now


DDRKirbyISQ: I typed some good stuff


DDRKirbyISQ: like, 2 pages, lol


DDRKirbyISQ: I’m gonna send this to ryan


DDRKirbyISQ: so as I was saying


DDRKirbyISQ: infested terrans will probably not work


DDRKirbyISQ: but you could try sending scourge


DDRKirbyISQ: (the overmind broodlings act like ground AND air units)


DDRKirbyISQ: but before you send the scourge, you gotta use devourers


DDRKirbyISQ: cause the acid spores decrease the chance that the scourge will be absorbed into the broodlings


DDRKirbyISQ: so scourge might work


DDRKirbyISQ: IF the spore defense system doesn’t kill them


DDRKirbyISQ: which means you pretty much have to send 300 at a time


DDRKirbyISQ: I guess you ~could~ try plaguing them to deat


DDRKirbyISQ: *daeth


DDRKirbyISQ: **death


DDRKirbyISQ: but you’d have to use irradiate as well to speed the process


DDRKirbyISQ: and it still does damage only a little faster than it can regenerate


DDRKirbyISQ: because I forgot to mention, it has 20 defense


DDRKirbyISQ: so dark templar are basically the only way


DDRKirbyISQ: unless you can get your hands on civilians


DDRKirbyISQ: or better yet, HALLUCINATED civilians


DDRKirbyISQ: in a hallucinated bunker


DDRKirbyISQ: they just might be able to stop the overmind broodlings


DDRKirbyISQ: if they’re backed by 6000 or so other units


DDRKirbyISQ: but teching up to civilians might take a while


DDRKirbyISQ: plus, you basically have to have control of the entire map to get enough resources


DDRKirbyISQ: so the only REAL way to kill them is to use the diablo clone


DDRKirbyISQ: but then again, there’s a 25% chance that the diablo clone will just join the broodlings


DDRKirbyISQ: and even if he kills the broodlings, he might kill you afterwards


DDRKirbyISQ: but you might buy yourself time to tech up to civilians


DDRKirbyISQ: because civilians work extra well against the diablo clone


DDRKirbyISQ: especially if you can get your hands on a few Bartuc’s claws


DDRKirbyISQ: and if you socket the claws, you’re set


DDRKirbyISQ: and your civilians are unstoppable


DDRKirbyISQ: unless, of course, all of your allies decide to bs by sending medics to the diablo clone


DDRKirbyISQ: then your civilians might die quicker than the diablo clone


DDRKirbyISQ: especially if they send their mass dark templars against your civilians


DDRKirbyISQ: (because they’ve been massing dts for the overmind broodlings_


DDRKirbyISQ: and if they use mind control on your civilians, well


DDRKirbyISQ: I hope you massed scvs


DDRKirbyISQ: because the only way to stop a civilian is to stack buildings on top of it until it cant move


DDRKirbyISQ: vespene refineries work best for this


DDRKirbyISQ: unless of course, you have 72 science vessels


DDRKirbyISQ: in which case you can trap the civilian in a huge defensive matrix


DDRKirbyISQ: unless, of course, you went with hallucinated civilians


DDRKirbyISQ: which cant be stopped, period


DDRKirbyISQ: and if they’re in a hallucinated bunker, your doom will be that much faster


DDRKirbyISQ: unless you can convince your ally to attack someone else


DDRKirbyISQ: usually offering complete slavery and willingness to give up all resources as well as units might work


DDRKirbyISQ: unless your ally is an @$$hole….or a computer


DDRKirbyISQ: but why would anyone play with either of those?


DDRKirbyISQ: erm…I mean…play ~against~


DDRKirbyISQ: because you have to play with a computer, lol


DDRKirbyISQ: anyways, you basically have to surrender if they have hallucinated civilians


DDRKirbyISQ: unless ~you~ hallucinate the already hallucinated civilians


DDRKirbyISQ: or you infest them using 72 queens


DDRKirbyISQ: of course, you could always try building a Xel’Naga temple, but that’s always a last resort


DDRKirbyISQ: wow


DDRKirbyISQ: I


DDRKirbyISQ: I’ve written 4 pages already


DDRKirbyISQ: and over 1,000 words


DDRKirbyISQ: if only essays were this easy to write…


DDRKirbyISQ: so anyways, double hallucination and infestation are good options


DDRKirbyISQ: although you probably wont be able to double mind control them, since that requires about 6,000 dark archons


DDRKirbyISQ: so stick with the double hallucination if youre ‘toss


DDRKirbyISQ: and if you’re terran,


DDRKirbyISQ: well, you could always try building the ultimate defensive structure


DDRKirbyISQ: photon cannon on top of a missile turret on top of a bunker on top of a sunken colony


DDRKirbyISQ: of course, you’ll have to support it with defensive matrix and about 20 medics and scvs


DDRKirbyISQ: but it’s definitely worth it if you have the gas to tech up that far


DDRKirbyISQ: it helps if you research vespene undepletion


DDRKirbyISQ: so that you can replenish your geysers if they run out of gas


DDRKirbyISQ: because vespene undepletion isn’t that far up the 6th tech tree


DDRKirbyISQ: and if you dont have enough gas to tech up that far


DDRKirbyISQ: you’re gonna have to mass battlecruisers


DDRKirbyISQ: it should be easy enough until the very end


DDRKirbyISQ: where you have to kill off your scvs to lower your supply


DDRKirbyISQ: because you need every single battlecruiser you can get


DDRKirbyISQ: otherwise it might fail


Hermes7z7: timmy


Hermes7z7: STOP


Hermes7z7: lol


Hermes7z7: d2


Hermes7z7: chan cube


DDRKirbyISQ: when they’re all ready, use an overloaded yamato gun attack


DDRKirbyISQ: (of course, you have to research that first)


DDRKirbyISQ: and be sure to upgrade your yamato gun, too


Hermes7z7: artbitor building?


DDRKirbyISQ: you dont want to only use like 100 energy


Hermes7z7: citadel of adun?


DDRKirbyISQ: you have to use the full energy supply of the battlecruiser


Hermes7z7: D2


Hermes7z7: join cube/cube


DDRKirbyISQ: and all of the yamato gun blasts have to be aimed at the foot of the civilian


DDRKirbyISQ: if you aim it at the head, he’ll just ingest it and then spit it back out


DDRKirbyISQ: just like if you had tried to send scourge against


DDRKirbyISQ: him


DDRKirbyISQ: so anyways, good luck


 


 


Starcraft rant 2: Starcraft Mod


 


DDRKirbyISQ: I should make an sc mod


DDRKirbyISQ: I’ll call it, “Protoss ner”–erm…I mean…”Starcraft Unlimited”


DDRKirbyISQ: yeah


Red7z7: protoss nerfed


Red7z7: those bastards


DDRKirbyISQ: heehee


DDRKirbyISQ: ….


DDRKirbyISQ: …


DDRKirbyISQ: which bastards?


Red7z7: protoss


DDRKirbyISQ: ah


DDRKirbyISQ: heh


DDRKirbyISQ: the and their, “we are the superior race”


DDRKirbyISQ: I think I’ll keep the protoss the same in my mod


DDRKirbyISQ: and I’ll add psionic powers to the zerg


DDRKirbyISQ: and the terrans will get a bajillion different types of marines


Red7z7: haha


DDRKirbyISQ: rocket launcher marine


DDRKirbyISQ: flamethrower marine (because firebats don’t know how to get the job done)


DDRKirbyISQ: rpg marine *wink*


DDRKirbyISQ: sniper marine


DDRKirbyISQ: kamikaze marine


DDRKirbyISQ: sword marine


DDRKirbyISQ: pistol marine


DDRKirbyISQ: machine gun marine


DDRKirbyISQ: rambo marine


DDRKirbyISQ: idiot marine


DDRKirbyISQ: dead meat marine


DDRKirbyISQ: kung fu marine


DDRKirbyISQ: and dont forget, assasin marine


DDRKirbyISQ: and bow marine


DDRKirbyISQ: and marine marine (underwater)


DDRKirbyISQ: and flying marine


Red7z7: marine marine


Red7z7: ownz


DDRKirbyISQ: yeah


DDRKirbyISQ: then there’s transformer marine


DDRKirbyISQ: mech marine (goliaths are a joke, they don’t even have lasers)


Red7z7: haha


DDRKirbyISQ: psycho marine


DDRKirbyISQ: trooper marine (with ultra-heavy armor


DDRKirbyISQ: running marine


DDRKirbyISQ: (perfect for speeding past defenses)


DDRKirbyISQ: food marine (followers of super-food man)


Red7z7: yak


DDRKirbyISQ: mutated marines (think zerg)


Red7z7: hah


DDRKirbyISQ: garbage marines (attack using leftover resources….think gas….)


DDRKirbyISQ: jetpack marine


DDRKirbyISQ: kiddie marine


DDRKirbyISQ: (i.e. private)


DDRKirbyISQ: old fogey marine


DDRKirbyISQ: grenade marine


DDRKirbyISQ: napalm grename marine


DDRKirbyISQ: flashbang marine


DDRKirbyISQ: and of course, psychic marine


DDRKirbyISQ: nuke marine


DDRKirbyISQ: hacker marine


DDRKirbyISQ: engineer marine


DDRKirbyISQ: spy marine


DDRKirbyISQ: infiltrator marine


DDRKirbyISQ: wall marine (basically a huge brick)


DDRKirbyISQ: ninja marine


Red7z7: me and nicky are talking about super food man


DDRKirbyISQ: haha


Red7z7: cuz he owns


DDRKirbyISQ: yep


DDRKirbyISQ: that’s why there’s food marines


DDRKirbyISQ: and then of course, they’res dog marines


DDRKirbyISQ: and cat marines


DDRKirbyISQ: and turtle marines


DDRKirbyISQ: and l33t marines, whatever those are


DDRKirbyISQ: and marooned marines


DDRKirbyISQ: and mooning marines


DDRKirbyISQ: (last resort)


DDRKirbyISQ: and club marines


DDRKirbyISQ: and teacher marines


DDRKirbyISQ: and yeah